Around the block

So I get home this evening, open the door and go through my usual ritual...say hello to the dog who is always utterly ecstatic I'm home, home, finally home. Where have you been all day my human, she asks.

Then the daughter, who greets me night after night with a truly lovely, "hello, mommy." Always in a voice slightly crossed between upper crust British and a teeny, tiny little girl.

To yell up the long flight of stairs to the Man-child. "Hello, my son."

I pitter, patter and eventually make my way up that steep incline of stairs, huffing and puffing despite the fact I make this climb no less than three to four times a day (GD desk job) to the computer where I promptly log into Facebook.

Here I find this post from the Man-child...
"No, I don't actually have a hole where my kidney is. I don't know whether to feel happy that my acting is that good, or bad that you think I'm capable of leading such a depressing life."

I turn to my child, knowing there is a truly fine story behind this little ditty and he explains...

But before I share his response with you, let me give you a little context...

I have, without a doubt, the most beautifully intelligent and creative child, who for some reason, known only to him, is barely scrapping by in school. Every day same old thing. Do your homework, do your homework, do your homework, did you do your homework. I swear. It's not that he's incapable or slow or stupid, maybe he's lazy? There's a quote from Gilmore Girls I always think of when I think of this child...

"She's got a C average which means she's either lazy or stupid. I can work with either. Frankly sometimes stupid is easier. I can scare the stupid out of you, but the lazy runs deep."

Folks, let me tell you. Lazy may run skin deep but stubbornness, stubbornness runs all the way through the soul, down each extremity, and out through the head. He's been stubbornly refusing to succeed academically.

Then this semester something happened. A switch flipped, a light bulb went on, God tapped him on the shoulder. He had the realization he'll be graduating in a few short months and wants to go to senior ball and sober grad night and graduation.

I logged on to check his grades the other night. Dear readers, I ask you...do you know what grades he has right now? Do you know? Do you think it could possibly be A's? If so, you'd be right. But do you know what else he has, other than straight A's 4 weeks into the new semester? Dear readers-can you even begin to guess?

100% in every class.

Not only A's, not only straight A's, but straight A+'s.

I just want to punch him in the forehead, I swear.

As for the little ditty above, the Facebook post. I'll tell you tomorrow.

Around the block